Photo Credits: SUNDAY. PAGE 1. FOOTLOOSE
So, my phone crashed. The screen was laterally and vertically inverted which meant I had to stand on my head in front of a mirror to make calls. The touch pad however, remained unchanged. So if the icon was in one place, I had to calculate where it would be if the phone were normal and then tap the screen. It was a nightmare. I wanted to curse, shout and do the thing that comes so naturally to every Goan – blame someone.
And then I wondered, how would other people react if their phones had to crash like say Aires Rodrigues and Vijai Sardessai and …..
I can imagine Aires Rodrigues sending everyone a message that would read like this.
“Yesterday night while listening to a Remo’s ‘O Meri Muni’ my phone suddenly went dead. I tried to resuscitate it by pressing all the buttons, but nothing happened. Although in a state of shock I am sending this SMS from my other phone. I blame Remo for the crash and since the phone was less than 18 years old, Remo needs to be booked for abusing a minor.
I have therefore registered a case and asked the police to seize his passport, ration card, aadhar card, PAN card and any other cards they find at home in Siolim. Remo must be place under arrest until my phone is repaired.”
Now what would Vijai Sardessai say if his phone had to crash? It would be something like this.
“My phone crashed on Saturday night, but there is no need to worry. What worries me is that the Congress is also crashing. The reason why I am not worried is because I had only three contacts, all independent MLAs, on my phone. That is why I decided to float the third front. The moment I get another MLA to join me I will call it the Fourth Front. Have to admit, I would have been more worried if I had lost my voter list.”
And what would Luizinho Faleiro say if his phone had to suddenly go dead? My guess is as good as yours. But here’s what I think the GPCC State president would have said.
“I crashed out of the Goa Assembly in 2007 and my phone crashed out in 2016. It is obvious that my phone is not in sync with my political career, but please don’t quote me. I have a feeling that the phone crashed because of the past sins, or should I say sims, of the party and for that I ask forgiveness. I ought to give it for repairs but since I am a loyal soldier of the party I will let the High Command take that decision. Since my friends and well-wishers will find it difficult to contact me on Whatsapp and Facebook I request them to meet me in person … not in Navelim.”
Finally, what would Kennedy Afonso, the man who is fighting for Justice for Fr Bismarque say if his phone had to crash? He would call a press conference and say.
“My phone did not crash, it was murdered. I took it to the service center and they told me the crash was caused by drowning (it fell in a bucket of water) which I refuse to believe because the phone’s case was not near the bucket when the incident occurred. I have asked the service centre to conduct a second post mortem. They agreed, and after a week told me the final verdict would be out only after a viscera test on the internals, like battery and mother board. I am skeptical about what the service center had to say. Hence, I have decided to form a group comprising people with crashed phones to demand Justice for Android.”
