PANAJI
For many, reminiscing about their grandmothers is accompanied by fond memories of the stories they told, the time spent at their homes, or the showers of gifts, love and wisdom they naturally impart. In today’s busy, bustling world, grandmothers often step in as much more than just occasional caregivers.
MORE THAN CAREGIVERS
They play pivotal roles in contemporary parenting. Far beyond being mere “babysitters”, they shape maternal identity, provide a behavioural blueprint, and maintain and strengthen family bonds. Grandmothers do not merely assist in parenting; they redefine it through their wisdom, daily assurances and profound relationships with their grandchildren.
Mothers today often look back on their own mothers as lifelong pillars of strength. “My mother’s love, guidance and unwavering support have always been my anchor, but it meant even more when I became a mother myself. She stood by me through every step, reassuring me, guiding me and loving my baby as her own second child,” says Steffi Rego. Deborah Pacheco mirrors this sentiment: “My mum is my one constant. It’s truly a blessing to have that pillar of strength to pick you up when you are weak. It’s the trait I’m trying to inherit.”
Vanessa Soares reminisces about her mother, recalling the qualities of perseverance, humility, gratitude and patience she has imbibed. “Growing up, I watched my mother handle various life situations. Now, as a mother, I follow her ways; her patience, her energetic charisma and her passion to learn new things. She never gave up and always told me not to lose hope.” Carol Noronha shares a similar comfort found in her mother’s constant presence. “My mother was a stay-at-home mum; she was present at every big and small moment of my childhood. I loved the idea of returning home and seeing her. It provided security, and therefore, I made a firm choice to be available to my kids in their growing years.”
LESSONS PASSED DOWN
Grandmothers actively shape the way their daughters approach motherhood. More often than not, women carry forward exactly what their mothers taught them. Vanessa’s mother taught her never to give up: “My mother believed it was never too late to learn a new skill. She learnt music after retirement and started driving after her three kids started school. So, I look for new opportunities on YouTube and now with AI, to learn new hacks and improve my sewing skills. She loved gifting others, whether by baking a cake, making a dessert or stitching a dress, and I do the same.”
For Deborah, replicating her mother’s constancy is key. “My mum is always around when I need her, even if it means sitting in silence. It’s something I mirror every day, making sure I’m present and stopping everything for just a hug if that’s what my child needs.” Carol highlights the religious values passed down to her: “My mother would always say ‘Jesus, Mary, Joseph’ whenever she accomplished a difficult task. I find myself subconsciously blurting out these words ever so often.”
A BOND BEYOND GENERATIONS
The bond between a grandparent and grandchild is incomparable. These mothers shared how grandmotherly love has directly shaped their own children. Deborah notes that her mother is her children’s safe place, providing emotional and physical support whenever possible. “Being miles apart doesn’t hamper their relationship from growing every day through daily calls and sharing the ups and downs of the day. She also helps pass down family traditions and pampers the kids, as all grandmothers do.” Carol observes a shift in her mother’s parenting style. “I believe my mother enjoys her role as a grandmother even more than when she was raising us. She says watching my children grow gives her a chance to be the mother she couldn’t be with my siblings and me because, at that time, she had to ‘get the job done’. Now she gets to do the fun stuff of just loving the children and being the ‘fun’ elder.”
Steffi shares how instrumental her mother has been in her own child’s life. “Even after my maternity leave, my mother encouraged me to return to work with confidence, constantly reminding me that my baby would always be cared for. Watching her nurture and love my child fills my heart with endless gratitude and joy. She is not just an incredible mother, but the most loving grandmother, too. I’m forever thankful for everything she has done and continues to do for our family.”
For Vanessa, this Mother’s Day brings a deep sense of longing. “I miss my mother so much; she left a huge legacy for us to follow. She was amazing at all that she did and was the complete package. My daughters and I have picked up quite a few, if not all, of her traits and habits.”
LEGACY OF LOVE
Grandmothers are vital co-parents in an era where families are constantly on the run. They shape their daughters into the mothers they become and serve as the golden threads weaving generations together. This Mother’s Day, it is time we celebrate both our mothers and grandmothers as the true heartbeat of our families.
