Sahil, a pre-primary student, was naughty, talkative and knew most of his nursery rhymes by heart. One afternoon, when he returned home from school, his mother Alka found that her little boy had stopped speaking. Even after much coaxing and asking him what happened, the child stayed silent and did not say a word.
The worried mother consulted a doctor and tried to find out from the teachers, students and headmistress why Sahil stopped talking. “There were no CCTV cameras then, so it was difficult to know if he had a fall, was hit or threatened. All efforts went vain,” says Alka. Later, Sahil was admitted to a special school, learnt embroidery and painting better than lessons, and grew up labelled ‘autistic’. To communicate, Alka underwent special training and left her job to stay with him. A flower that would have bloomed naturally stopped blooming, and no one knew why. “It remains a mystery till date,” says Alka, a Goan settled in Mumbai.
We often see such Sahils and see their parents live with lifelong pain in their hearts, not knowing whom to blame. When parents send their children to school, they know that a certain discipline is expected from the child. “But kids are kids, and who can control their mischief?” asks Shweta Shirodkar, a mother of two young boys who is often called to school to hear complaints about their naughtiness. Shweta is worried that scolding or hitting may deeply affect her children’s minds and may harm their growth into normal adults.
While there are few cases where teachers seek help from psychiatrists or counsellors to control their anger in class, there are students who visit psychiatrists with complaints of abuse from teachers. “Students of abuse do come for help. I get them transferred to another school. Teachers/heads of the departments do not think they are wrong in any situation. Anger, misbehaviour is justified,” observes Dr Meenacshi Martins, a noted psychiatrist in Goa.
“Anger and frustration is a form of vent, like that of a pressure cooker. The whistle blows when the steam gets too much. How to vent slowly and gradually instead of building it all up is something that one has to learn if they did not do it earlier. Most of the anger issues come from past experiences and resentments. Hence, anyone having these issues will have to seek counselling to understand and manage their temper better,” opines Mita Arora, counselling psychologist at Antarman Centre for Psychological Wellbeing in Panaji.
Goa is seeing cases of corporal punishment where teachers are found beating students, and this is a dangerous trend, points out a parent from Porvorim. “We are worried for our children because, adolescent children, when ashamed in front of their classmates, get emotionally hurt and may adopt wrong steps like running away from home or committing suicide,” said the anxious parent.
Recalling an incident, Anjali shares, “When my son was in primary school in Margao, he was beaten by the teacher with other noisy students. He began to avoid school and begged me not to send him. One day he said he gets beaten even if he doesn’t do mischief. I found the teacher had a bedridden husband and would vent her frustration on students, hitting them for no reason or small mistakes.” The children were terrified. Anjali went to the school and confronted the teacher. “She admitted she sometimes hits as managing 60 students is hard, and claims she hits on the buttocks where it doesn’t hurt much. I warned her of police action if she hit my child again. The teacher then stopped hitting and showed fake friendliness,” adds Anjali.
Why do teachers beat students, sometimes brutally? Is it frustration from personal lives, lack of compassion, no respect for their profession, stress from work, or behaviour seen in families? Do they get beaten at home and vent anger on weaker children? Psychologists say bottled-up emotions from stressful personal and professional lives look for a way out.
“Violence on social media makes a deep imprint and teaches ways to torture the weak. Childhood abuse can lead to personality disorders carried forward into adulthood. A child beaten by parents or teachers will behave similarly with her own children. Memories remain hidden in the mind, and a trigger can erupt them like a dormant volcano,” explains a retired HoD in psychology from a Margao college.
Hitting children cannot be justified by parents, guardians, caretakers or teachers. Physical punishment is not a way to show a child they did wrong and does not guarantee they will avoid the mistake next time. Dialogue remains the best way to teach discipline so children learn gently and do not grow up to harm the social fabric.
