Fitness first?
My boyfriend is obsessed with his body. He has been working out in the gym for a few years now but he was never this obsessive. Now it’s all about measuring his biceps and other things, wearing tight t-shirts, having protein and other supplements etc. I think he also spends more time getting ready that I do. The other day he took an hour.
Damsel in stress
Dear Damsel in stress
Ok, big question. What do you mean by ‘measuring his biceps and other things’? Pray tell, what other things does he measure? You, my girl, are now part of a gender neutral relationship. Normal gender tropes do not apply. But, there is a line drawn when it comes to body building. I do not get the obsession with tight t-shirts and other apparel. The other day, while visiting the new mall, or should I say the utterly preposterous and messy thing one may call a mall, I saw a boy wearing tight pants that ended above his ankles. Either he was a homeless boy who was just wearing what he could get his hands on, or he was someone without brains who is just aping someone else. For goodness sake, do you bathe in that thing? It sticks to your skin tighter than lycra. Reminds me of this ex I had who was a borderline stalker. Anyway, when it comes to your boyfriend I guess you’ll have to find out why he’s so obsessed with his body and not with you, or other things like financial betterment. Talk to him.
Antsy Uncle
In search of a nice girl
Why are girls so moody? I’ve been trying to find a girlfriend who is just like me, happy go lucky and without a care in the world. These days, most of the girls I meet are all the same, moody and only bothered about their looks and what to wear at the next night out. How do I find a nice girl?
Mr Nice Guy
Dear Nice guy
You know what they say about nice guys yeah? They finish last. Which in some ways is not a bad thing. I had this girlfriend once who….wait, never mind. So prepared to be single for a long long time. Because what you’re looking for is not really out there. You want a girl who is not moody and doesn’t think like a girl. I just showed your letter to my wife and she laughed so hard I think she just shot out the water she was drinking from her nostrils. Not a pretty sight, to be honest. You my friend need to realise a few things. This is the way women are built. That’s like a woman saying, “I want a boy who is not obsessed with sports, doesn’t want to constantly have a pissing contest with his friends, literally or hypothetically, and who doesn’t dig his nose when he thinks no one is looking.” Really now. Don’t mess with nature. Learn to adapt. Or well, then have fun with Mrs Palmer and her five sisters, if you know what I mean. *wink*
Antsy Uncle
Political ambhitions
I have noticed that our politicians these days are just thieves who do nothing else but make money. Why aren’t the youth getting into politics? I have a strong will to become a politician. How do I start?
Karan, Margao
Dear Karan
There’s an old joke my father used to tell me. Actually, wait. We don’t have the word count for it. If you want to become a politician and not fall into the same sewage pit that the others are in already then you need to first get a proper education. Politics is not just working with people from the grassroots upwards but also understanding the system and using logic and rationale to make decisions, something that most politicians today lack. Study politics, get involved with it at the college level and then work your way up. If you come up through the system, then you will probably understand it well. You sound like a man with good values, so hopefully you won’t get swayed by the money. While we’re at it, can you name a road after me? It would be so cool!
Antsy Uncle
