The third phase of elections has just concluded, and the next few weeks will be generally sedate, barring private political calculations and public speculations; this post-electoral lull extends till June 4, when the results of the ‘biggest festival of democracy’ shall be declared.
In Goa’s academic arena the school and college students are on vacation, while the administrative staff and teaching fraternity loaded with NEP prescriptions are busy planning for the new academic year. The JEE and NEET segment of students have started appearing on the congratulatory banners of coaching classes, their portraits wearing stethoscopes look alluring.
The ‘glycemic index’ of Goemkars surely goes up this season, with tons of 'pedhas' being distributed by academic celebrants. Parents and guardians are making the rounds of higher education institutes for admission of their ‘just out of school’ wards who are beaming and dreaming of an unleashed college life. Tailors are busy stitching uniforms, while new rain wear, bags, bottles, tiffin boxes arrive at home. That familiar whiff of freshly printed textbooks and notebooks has started filling homes.
It is vacation and friends are meeting over pizzas and ice creams, watching movies together, visiting malls, strolling on seashores, and of course burning their virtual calories playing games on the mobile screens. Some have enrolled for music, skating, chess, drawing and other hobby classes. Girls try and understand the kitchen chores from their mothers, while boys try their hands at bikes and cars.
In today’s vacations, people hardly visit relatives and go on annual family tours to another state. The familial bonding has weakened, and children do not explore outdoors. Their reading habits are dead, and they are anchored in their ‘mobile-screen lure’.
There is little conversation happening in homes, sibling rivalry is on a rise, like yester years no rosaries are said together in our homes, no family dinners, no going with elders for annual zatras and fests, and no respect and empathy demonstrated towards elders. Negligible correction of children happens in our homes now, for fear of hurting their ‘tender sensitive minds’.
Now when we give our children pocket money, we forget to give them advise based on our life’s experiences. While we accept our children’s boyfriends and girlfriends, we shy away from giving them polite cautionary advice on teenage relationships and emphasize the importance of abstinence, fidelity, and marriage. In our pep-talks about choice of white-collared professions, we do not address the ‘dignity of labour’. In our workshops on wealth creation, we do not underline honesty and our obligation to help the needy.
It is the responsibility of the parents to acquaint their children with their family history, introduce them to relatives, familiarize them with the struggles of the family, pass on the virtues and ethos of family and community life. Regrettably, our youngsters have become ruthlessly insensitive and selfish. They are obsessed with success and material gains. They are drawn towards mortal pleasures sans morality. Faith has vanished from their lives, and flaunting their atheist demeanour seems chic.
This generation cannot handle their freedom nor pressure, and quickly buckle under mundane challenges of daily life. They have gathered an inflated, fallacious sense of self-esteem and pride; and small failures can push them to the brink of self-harm. They misconstrue material assets for wealth and waste their lives in pursuit of riches.
We are fooled by the mirage of our children’s assumed innocence or presumed maturity and hold back our parental instincts to advise them on ‘pitfalls of life’. It is my considered opinion that books, websites, and friends are no match for parents and their intuitive parenting skills.
I remember my childhood in 70s in the port town as an elder child of middle-class parents. My father was the sole bread winner, and the sense of accountability was high in the family. Much of the grocery would be bought at the beginning of the month and was judiciously used. Mother would tailor clothes of neighbouring women and children to supplement family income. She’d give me tiffin for lunch right till my graduation. My shirts would be remodelled to fit my younger sister. New set of clothes would be an annual luxury at Diwali, and I managed my college tenure with a single pair of shoes.
The annual Kavlem Zatra was mandatory, and first week of every month I’d accompany my father on his bicycle to the ration shop in the town and stand in the queue to collect the quota of grains, pulses, sugar, and kerosene. My father would take me to his village at Durbhat and acquaint me with his classmates and the local nature and culture.
Values were imparted during the evening prayers after lighting lamp near the tulsi plant, bedtime stories inculcated a deep respect for the divine and consolidated our value system, respect for elders was enshrined in the conduct and on weekends my father would take me to visit my paternal grandmother.
My benevolent mother was kind and empathetic; cheerfully feeding guests, hawkers and beggars visiting our home, and she never bragged about it. Education was important, and my father visited my school to keep a track of my academic progress. There was also a time slot for outdoors. Participation in community programmes was encouraged and I regularly sang and danced in the summer cultural fests in our colony.
Vacations were exciting, as films were screened on the white walls of our building, and we’d have relatives visiting us from as far as Mumbai. Vacations were eventful and engaging, our father taking us on tours using his LTC entitlement.
I think vacation is a time to reflect, reconnect and refurbish our lost bliss and values. The innocence, camaraderie and simple joys of the bygone days must be recreated in this summer break. Don’t waste your vacation!
