What do parents owe to their children, and just how muchpower can parents rightfully exercise in their roles as care providers? When does society have the right to take achild away from a parent in order to protect the welfare of the child?Philosophers and lawyers have debated these questions for decades. The answers of course will depend on the particularsof specific cases and circumstances of the child. In today’s context the rights of the childhave to be discussed within the boundaries of the policies and law as set outby the government which is to be read together with the rights of the child asenshrined by the United Nations to which India is a signatory. In Goa, therights of the child should be discussed within the parameters of the GoaChildren’s Act 2003.
In this tiny state wehave many children who have their parents abroad or children being brought upby single parents. In several instancesas in the recent rape of a minor in South Goa, the child was being brought upand in the custody of the grandparents. This is not the first case where a child is being abused who was in thecustody of relations. In some cases they are sent to boarding schools. Undoubtedly decisions such as these are nevertaken with the child. They are oftentaken to suit the convenience of the parents and not in the ‘best interest ofthe child’. At a seminar held recently aprincipal of one school shared a touching story. She narrated that during the time of theKuwait War a young boy came up to the mike and prayed spontaneously “God Ithank you for having given birth to Saddam Husain otherwise I would have beenin boarding school all my life”. Lateron another boy told her “I thank God for the Kuwait War otherwise I would havebeen with my grandmother in a remote village without a TV and friends for therest of my life”.
As parents and adultswe need to listen to the voices of our children. It is not how much of time you spend withyour children. But the kind of time youspend with your children. It’s not howmuch work you do to provide for them but how sensitive you are to theirneeds. Some years ago a grown up ladyonce told me. “When I was young I hadpainted a beautiful picture which I took with great pride to show my mother whowas watching her favorite TV serial. Asusual she admonished and reprimanded me with unkind words for having disturbed her. This happened several times. I stopped sketching portraits and paintinganymore. Today instead of being anartist I am a clerk in a government office”. This is how we kill the creativity and talents of our children who areour assets and not our liabilities. Weare always training them to fit in a box, never to think out of the box.
The writer is a social scientist and lawyer. She is the manager of a school and one ofthose who has drafted the Goa Children’s Act
