The fact is that, as readers too, we soon mentally convert life into a statistic. One moment we are sympathising, and the next, we are moving on. The way I see it is, that we have become too sympathetic, but not empathetic enough. When one sympathises, they feel sorry, when they empathise, they try to understand the pain. Today, we hear something tragic, sympathise for a while and then we forget because we fail to feel. We also live in this bubble of untouchability, which means, we believe that nothing bad can ever happen to us or those we love.
Just a few days ago we were bombarded with images from the tragedy that struck at Elphinstone station, Mumbai. On that faithful day, none of those people who lost their lives ever in their wildest dreams thought they wouldn't reach home that evening. That moment, when tragedy struck, not only did their lives end, but the lives of those they left behind have forever been affected. However, the debates that we find ourselves embroiled in completely neglect the hearts and feelings of those who have been lost and those who lost. The way the political honchos are debating the issue, all you hear is numbers and blame. It was a major mess up, one of epic proportions, but when will we stop with the pointing of fingers and just get down to the business of rectifying the wrong? I have lived in Mumbai myself and have travelled those same trains and bridges while there. The problem is not a new one, it was just as bad then. However, as a collective, we seem to always first wait for something to go horribly wrong before we actually pull up our socks and get stuff done. On the news, each night there will be logical debates, important points being raised, shouting and screaming, and it all stops at that.
At this same incident, what was disgusting to digest were the reported crimes that took place while those innocents gasped for their last breaths. A pervert molesting a woman while she struggled for life, and miscreants robbing the dead and those fighting for survival. Reports like this will make any empath sick to their stomachs, not only empath, but every ‘humane being'. All of us are human, but it takes a special being to be humane in every situation. Humanity is rapidly being lost. When we hear such horror stories, we tend to question every bit of this society we are currently part of. How does one find the ability to look themselves in the mirror after indulging in such horrendous acts? How does one have the audacity to present themselves in public post such behaviour? It is becoming more obvious that we are a society in the throes of destruction. Values, morals and everything that tradition held together is falling apart. In days gone by, we spoke of and fought against social evils that refused equality to huge parts of the population. Today, we are battling a similarly deadly foe, an inner demon we never saw coming.
This apathy is evident in practically every little part of society. Just today as I was pulling out of a parking spot, another vehicle blocked me in. I politely asked him to move, and he got angry and aggressive toward me!! This was a reaction I never expected, but I realised that we have reached a point in civilization, where concern for another is as rare as an almost extinct Sumatran Rhinoceros. As we discussed issues of this type in our circle time class in school today, one of my students meekly said ‘Ma'am, I know it's horrible to say, but I feel quite ashamed to be an Indian, seeing how bad things are.' So, we stopped discussion right there and recalled humanity in the Indian society. We took a journey back, not too long ago, when people showed altruism in the purest sense when there was a terror attack in Mumbai in 2006. Then again in 2008, when the entire city was under siege. There were plenty who came forward to help this time as well. If there were less who felt they were entitled to do as they pleased and when, if there was more focus on building values instead of empires and if there was deeper emphasis on the being humane, this country would have been top notch. We can still make this dream a reality, if we just learn to feel, if we just learn to empathise and if we just let go of the pathetic apathy.
(Charlene Farrell is a counselling psychologist who works extensively with children and adolescents. She also counsels and works with individuals of all ages. Emotional well-being, to her, is of utmost importance to a fruitful existence)
