Is this phenomenon because women in Goa are relatively moreeducated and aware of their rights, as compared to their counter parts in otherstates? Besides many of them are ingainful employment and now do the balancing act of home and work. Women are now more independent and assertive,while the men remain stagnant in their patriarchal attitudes.
This frequently leads to differences between thecouple. Often the mother-in-law (MIL)factor or the Saas Bahu syndrome addsfuel to the fire and make matters infinitely worse. Some men tend to remain tied to the apronstrings of their mothers and sit on a fence, when they are required to sidewith the wife. In such instances womenare forced to assert themselves. Forthose pursuing a career, there is hardly any time to nurture therelationship. A combination of suchfactors ultimately leads to irreconcilable differences, which are hard to fixin a marriage. With simmering tension, continuousarguments and misunderstandings galore, the couples inevitably end up in courtfor legal separation orders, divorce or annulments. Interestingly the divorcerate in North Goa is twice as much as the rate in the South.
Many counselors and social scientists believe that Goans’dependence on jobs outside the state of Goa and in foreign countries, have alsocontributed to the increasing number of divorce petitions. When one spouse isabroad and the other is home, looking after the family, the physical andemotional attachment between them decreases, even as proximity with a friend orassociate increases. Sadly, children are the casualties of a broken home.
A divorce is the legal termination of a marriage by a courtin a legal proceeding, which can be done either mutually or singularly(contested divorce). A mutual divorce isalways better than a contested divorce. There is no dirty linen washed in public and it saves both time andmoney. Proceedings in court can get mucky sometimes, with allegations andcounter allegations. Unlike other states,Goa does not have a family court and divorce matters are taken up in regularcivil and criminal courts.
It is unfortunate that in a place considered by many as aparadise on earth, marriages are ending in divorce at an unprecedented rate.
The writer is a social scientist and a legalluminary on issues of women and children and human rights activists
