In roughly the last three decades, Valentine's Day has grown into a social trend among middle and upper class Indians. After economic liberalization was launched in the early 1990s, a new economic class has emerged; one which possesses the currency associated with socializing orientations and materialistic ideas. Post-liberalization social trends have assumed many forms. Foreign television channels arrived in India and so did a new entertainment media. Netflix is among the latest fad. One can get to view just about anything the heart desires. India’s own film industry, notably Bollywood, has embraced western paradigms. As always, the lower economic classes are excluded. Gone are the days when films were socially inclined and contrasted the rich-villain with the impoverished poor in simple film settings.
According to economic theory the launch of liberal economics was meant to be the architecture for a uniform level playing field for the rich and the poor and rapid transformation towards social and economic equity. But, no! Thirty of the biggest conglomerates grew in total assets and smaller businesses lost out on post-liberalization.
The privileged classes not only gained economically but also acquired social liberties and post-modernist ideas of life. For example, the social liberties that came about opened spaces for dating sites and new patterns of socializing in pubs, and dubious discos. Drugs and on-tap booze followed. Commercial establishments cashed in on this sub-culture.
Valentine's Day was one of these. Corporates saw in it an incredibly lucrative holiday to celebrate to punctuate their profit lines. It incorporated gifts of elegant jewellery, flowers, and dining at classy restaurants. Sociologists have observed that these kinds of indulgences do not always help a relationship; they often sour it.
The origins of Valentine’s Day can be traced back to an ancient Roman fertility festival involving sacrificial goats or to a Chaucer poem about birds. “It is one of those mysterious historical or antiquarian problems which are doomed never to be solved,” (The Times -1853). The same source observes that it is “just as well that the holiday’s history remains disputed. In Western countries, and among the westernized in more traditional countries, the question posed is: Is Valentine’s Day a sanctified celebration, or marketing scam that entrenches the hegemony of the nuclear family or is it just a harmless convention that should not be the focus of attention. The New York Daily Tribune wrote in 1847: “There was a time when Valentine’s Day meant something. … We hate this modern degeneracy, this miscellaneous and business fashion…“Now nobody makes more than a joke of it.”
The commercialization has gotten so extreme that it needs to be protested, wrote Samhita Mukhopadhyay, author and columnist. She avers that modern love is governed by a “romantic-industrial complex” that profits by subtly enforcing and exploiting romantic desires and insecurities. In her view, romantic people deserve better, more authentic and sustainable ways to express their affections. She asks: “Let’s find a way to honour ourselves that does not rely on buying stuff.”
Oddly, Valentine's Day in India is also the stuff out of which revolting and reactionary politics has emerged. Various political parties have condemned Valentine's Day as an unwelcome influence of Western culture on India. It has been variously described as an attack on Indian culture for corporate interests. Activists have been known to raid card shops and burn Valentine's Day cards and flowers throwing rotten tomatoes at couples and attacking restaurants. Couples cannot even hold hands. Vigilantes follow couples into public parks and have their hair cut off and their faces painted black to humiliate them. Unmarried couples would even be forcibly married. If one of them is non-Hindu, he/she will be converted to Hinduism before marriage. Public display of affection such as kissing is unacceptable and such unrequited love is met with harassment known by the euphemism "eve-teasing". It can get more sadistic; there have been acid attacks on victim’s faces.
Discordant leaders have threatened those who would observe the day brazenly and warned of violent social penalties. Those who assert the freedom to celebrate it are designated as shameless and in violation of Indian culture. Commercial establishments are threatened to stop selling goods that celebrate Valentine's Day. Jeans-clad ‘desis’ warn couples with dire consequences if they share affections publicly, including the threat they would be forcibly married. Or, they convert the couple into siblings by forcing the ritual of making the girl tie a ‘rakhi’ to the boy.
The simple sociological fact is that India is part of a globalized world. Its educated population has learned western values including those from traditionalist groups living in the West. Despite counter-claims by traditionalists, even Raksha Bandhan is subtly used to launch romances. This radicalizing of anti-Valentine’s Day is devoid of genuine claims of cultural purity.
Some weeks ago, the Indian government urged people to hug cows on Valentine's Day in India and celebrate ‘Cow Hug Day’. The Animal Welfare Board offered its anti-dote: “Hugging cows will bring emotional richness and increase individual and collective happiness.” The ‘cow-hug’ call was widely derided and dubbed as extinct. The government hastily withdrew in embarrassment.
It is also time to re-visit what commemorations like Valentine’s Day, Fathers Day, Mothers Day, or Friendship Day justly mean. It must be affirmed that those who display affection spontaneously in public sans vulgarity or out of instinctive joy, should not be tormented and besieged by narrow-minded vigilantes whose views are archaic and belong in a century gone by.
Affection between humans is for each and every day and cannot be designated as a festival-style flash to commercialize or ‘eventize’. They only serve to make a mockery of love between people. Time for all to re-think sanely and rationally!
