bio: Gauri Gharpure studied journalism at Columbia University, New York, on a Fulbright grant. She makes paper jewellery on the side and tweets @gaurigharpure
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We were curious to see how Fr John Joseph Morondo would deal with the chapter on human reproduction. That particular lesson was routinely skipped in most other schools and was given for "self-study." We were naughty and naive 16-year-olds who had much appetite for such enlightenment. The class had full attendance.
Fr Morondo was as meticulous as he was funny, his diagrams were works of art, his out-of-the-box similes made complex subjects feel within reach. In that class, however, he was not joking at all. He bore a grave, almost pained expression. Unprecedented. We were nervous. He explained the reproductive systems and contraceptive methods without watering down science by using vague societal euphemisms. He ended his lecture with an intense, unshakable message: "This is science and you need to know it. But remember, life is God's gift."
Most of us were not prepared to deal with the moral consequences of Fr Morondo's pithy, open-ended statement at the time. But later in life, when I poured out several confusions to him in long letters, the Jesuit priest guided without judging, articulated without accusation, and above all, loved unconditionally. When Pope Francis declared on Monday that abortion can be absolved by ordinary priests for the foreseeable future, the rhetoric arguments and soliloquies with Fr Morondo began flooding my mind.
Pope Francis said on Monday: "I wish to restate as firmly as I can that abortion is a grave sin, since it puts an end to an innocent life. In the same way, however, I can and must state that there is no sin that God's mercy cannot reach and wipe away when it finds a repentant heart seeking to be reconciled with the Father." The pope's recent statements, right from homosexuality to refugees, to women's rights attempt to reconcile something as vast as religion with deeply personal, intimate struggles. He has exhibited compassion that is not just full of piety, but also a rational empathy of the realities of our modern times.
When I called a local priest with a request to share his views, he replied, "I'll pass." When I asked him why he was choosing not to comment, he was as helpful as he was honest: "Because it is a tricky thing, no?" Tricky indeed! The pope has also cautioned that priests may view the situation on a "case-by-case" basis. Each life is unique and so are the reasons and the consequences of the choices we make. Viewing abortion from a straight-jacket perspective is impossible. Abortion is an issue that goes beyond religious boundaries. It also needs to be weighed in from gender, socio-economic and human rights perspectives.
Faulty socio-religious interpretations which put the male offspring on a pedestal are largely to blame for the female foeticide epidemic in India. In a different spectrum of choices, abortion is routinely (and without qualms) carried out for family planning irrespective of whether the aborted foetus is male or female. Societal reactions for such reproductive choices, however, are vastly different for married and single women.
Before we attempt to allow religion to guide us, we must also question if religious institutions have sufficiently enlightened and equipped their believers to bear the consequences of the teachings in totality in the first place. Are we a society that will accept a single woman who decides not to abort? No, most would rather let their hypocrisy swallow their religious beliefs for social face-keeping in such a scenario. Interestingly, the proposed Surrogacy (Amendment) Bill 2016 doesn't allow singles to use the reproductive technique and so singles desiring parenthood are cornered in a Catch-22 situation.
Now, picture a married woman who wants to focus on her career and decides to delay pregnancy. Here, most will feel entitled to raise their moral radar and almost immediately accuse her of being selfish and unwomanly. Next, assuming that it is not possible for all young, healthy people to remain celibate, try to imagine how often, in our closed society, do single persons discuss in advance their preferred contraceptive methods or their stance on an unplanned pregnancy with their future sexual partners? How willing are men to engage in discussions about the consequences of their actions on another body?
Most of the times, the emotional and physical ramifications of an unplanned pregnancy are exclusively borne by women. If abortion were indeed a sin, its repentance must be equally borne by both who co-created a life. Unfortunately, in our society, the woman becomes the sole object of criticism and counsel and men go scott-free.
A New York Times op-ed column by Jill Filipovic titled "The Pope's Unforgiving Message of Forgiveness on Abortion" talks from a feminist point of view and suggests that not all women who decide to abort feel continually guilty, sad or confused. Agreeing to bring on a life might not be a natural, instinctive choice for some. At best, religion works as a guiding force, at worst it works as an intimidating deterrence because of which actions are often far removed from true moral reasoning or understanding.
Pro-choice people might not see the need to beg forgiveness in the first place. Pro-life people may be slightly unnerved by the papal announcement. The more potent and immediate relief would perhaps be for God-fearing women who chose to abort and lived in a constant conflict of faith versus personhood. But, I feel that before one goes out seeking forgiveness for anything from anyone, one must first make peace with themselves. It doesn't work the other way round.
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