Sonia Kawthankar’s maternal family has cornea defect issue and her mother as well as grandmother faced the same visibility problem, as she has been facing since birth. Sonia has 50 per cent visibility. Her brother also has 40 per cent visibility and as he could not get a job in India, he went to UK and settled there.
“My brother cannot bear piercing rays of the sun, and he has visibility issue at night too. It’s hereditary in our family, but we are dealing with it gracefully,” says Sonia, married to a person with a similar visibility issue. With no complaints towards life or society, both of them are living joyfully and as parents to daughter Shriya, are showcasing a beautiful example of adaptability in a family.
A Roman Catholic, Sonia is married to Shankar, a Hindu who suffered glaucoma by birth, which has left his left eye completed dead and the right eye has only 15 per cent visibility. Working at Goa Medical College as a telephone operator at the Medical Superintendent’s office, optimistic Shankar is keen in pursuing his post-graduation and even PhD, once his daughter starts going to college.
“My husband is waiting for our daughter to grow up as he would be able to study together with her help,” shares Sonia who did not want to pursue education after her SSC. She recalls how she was teased in school because she could not see properly.
“I studied at St Lawrence School at Agassaim, living at my maternal uncle’s home. Then I did my SSC from Open School living at Ucassaim in Bardez. I didn’t want to study further, so opted for a job at National Association for the Blind (Goa) hostel in the house-keeping department. I was doing multitasking there for nine years from 2003 to 2011. It was my first job, and I learnt many things there,” says Sonia who got married in 2012, and began to run her husband’s stationery shop at Vasant Joshi MES College at Zuarinagar. She runs it till date, and is now planning to make a change in the business.
Her stationery shop has Xerox machine also and she can handle the machine well. The shop used to run well, but of late students are relying on online notes and using AI. So taking photo-copies of written notes is becoming outdated. The business is slowing down, so Sonia is thinking of doing something contemporary as a source of income. The stationary shop belonged to her husband who earned his living through it, before getting a job in GMC. The hardworking couple do not shy away from putting extra efforts in their work.
Sonia likes travelling, and she has visited some places of worship too. “We went to Tirupati, Shirdi and few other religious places but I would like to visit more temples as and when we get time. I like sports too, especially football. However, currently both of us do only jogging in the morning. That’s a regular routine which we follow, to keep us fit. Shankar is active in socio-cultural activities, and also sports. I support him in his activities wholeheartedly,” states Sonia who is well aware of the difficulties and challenges Shankar faced during his childhood and while growing up. “It’s time to live joyfully and forget the past miseries,” they tell each other. Daughter Shriya is the glue that binds the family together. The couple focuses on her education. Thankfully she does not carry forward Sonia’s hereditary eyesight issue. Sonia’s father is supportive to her, but her mother and brother have cut off their relationship with her after her marriage as she remained firm in her decision to marry Shankar.
Sonia asserts, “I have visibility issue, and he too has the same. We can understand each other’s difficulties better. We are not ashamed of our disability, and have accepted it gracefully. At a time when compatible couples also do not get along well, and end up with broken marriages, we are confident that our bond will remain stable and we will continue supporting each other in crises. Life may throw anything at us, we will accept it, and work to make things happen. My message to persons with disabilities is, do not hide your disability. Be vocal about it, overcome the challenges, and do your best to make peace with life.”
