The communication gap between the two sexes is widening as the years roll by in recent times as mistrust and suspicion between two individuals of the opposite sex is growing alarmingly by the day. Being a simple teacher, social worker, university professor, with over 50 years direct involvement with the social, political and educational well-being of the society at large, I have witnessed numerous cultural interactions amongst people which led to the positive interaction amongst persons of the opposite sexes directed towards the holistic development of the society at large. But this is history. The bygone eras constituting essentially of persons even in the last generation saw priests, teachers, doctors, eminent individuals as facilitators of bonding between individuals of opposite sex directed towards betterment and security of the society at large. The catalytic role played by these ‘societal high priests' towards bringing even two individuals totally unknown to one another had even led to a strong and everlasting bonding to a point that by chance if one partner passed away, the co-partner often felt disturbed, distressed and isolated and expired soon thereafter.
Today, divorces seem to be the rule. It is no fairy tale that divorces, separations, murders of the partner or what we now call ‘marital rape' were unheard of or rare in the last century. Ours is the great country where women were seen as goddesses and men were considered as ‘patidev'. We are slowly seeing lots of women fasting with the intentions of acquiring ‘divine protection' from the husband, as much as we also rarely see husbands giving their all, to ensure that he sacrifices precious moments to see that his wife is happy, contended and forgets the lost comforts of her maternal home.
Strangely, urbanization and lop-sided educational values instead of fostering faster and firmer bonding has led to distrust and one-upmanship amongst persons of the opposite sex. Today there is the mushrooming of women groups specialized in pseudo women empowerment wherein instead of resolving the great divide and mending the growing misunderstanding between husband and wife, they instigate the fairer sex into the belief that their husband is an adversary, cheat, bully and needs to be shamed, punished, harassed and exposed.
The battle of the sexes today has not only pitted the husband against the wife but also adversely and gravely affected the furtherance of education and parental love and guidance to the children, which constitute the next generation. If we dispassionately see the ground situation and study the realities you see the fissures and the widening gap between people growing. I have personally seen friends and acquaintances and even priests and politicians besides well-meaning businessmen refusing to help hitch-hiking women because they men are afraid that she could be on the road to cheat and exploit.
We believe in equality and we must accept rationally there are equally bad women who must be dealt with equally firmly by law as bad men.
My friends from the legal fraternity, and more specifically Advocate Euclid Heredia brought to my notice that the age-old archaic Victorian law of the British raj is not gender neutral and at all times punishes the male for rape, infidelity, cheating and other crimes against or on women.
But strangely in the era of equality before the law there is no law that punishes a woman for infidelity, cheating, harassment or even sexual molestation. This matter today is before the Supreme Court awaiting its decision that guilty women too must face equal punishment says the lawyers. It is no secret that women cheating on their hard-working husbands stationed abroad is extremely common in Goa.
In the era of working women, finding financial security and empowerment women are equally liberated and ultra-modern that they dominate over their husbands at home and harass, exploit their juniors or even senior colleagues in both obtaining sexual favors or domination but also filing sexual harassment cases, if they fail to meet the career scale up objectives and ambitions.
We agree that Casanovas amongst men must be punished. Sadly, we fail to find a solution to deal with women, who exploit and terrorize men. When a man asks a woman for her share in the bringing up the family it is termed as dowry harassment but a woman is free to engage agents or make open enquiries of what the prospective husband would have to deliver in terms of worldly comforts. If you are to marry me, says the prospective bride, show me your bank balance, the security of your job, the comfort of a house without the meddling of the mother-in-law, details of all properties, stocks and shares that would enable me to accept you as a life partner. Is this equality before the law?
No doubt today gay marriages are on the increase not only due to sexual orientation but due to inequality before law.
There are many incidences, instances with the purview of environmental, psychological and social sciences beyond the scope of this essay to justify as to why the growing gap between the sexes would remain as a challenge, as mankind has over-populated the earth and by unscientifically conducting himself, in a selfish manner has undermined the goodness as well as the tolerance limits of nature as the goodness of sustainable, holistic and sacrifice involving. We must live and let live life in all forms.
Today, divorces seem to be the rule. It is no fairy tale that divorces, separations, murders of the partner or what we now call ‘marital rape' were unheard of or rare in the last century. Ours is the great country where women were seen as goddesses and men were considered as ‘patidev'. We are slowly seeing lots of women fasting with the intentions of acquiring ‘divine protection' from the husband, as much as we also rarely see husbands giving their all, to ensure that he sacrifices precious moments to see that his wife is happy, contended and forgets the lost comforts of her maternal home.
Strangely, urbanization and lop-sided educational values instead of fostering faster and firmer bonding has led to distrust and one-upmanship amongst persons of the opposite sex. Today there is the mushrooming of women groups specialized in pseudo women empowerment wherein instead of resolving the great divide and mending the growing misunderstanding between husband and wife, they instigate the fairer sex into the belief that their husband is an adversary, cheat, bully and needs to be shamed, punished, harassed and exposed.
The battle of the sexes today has not only pitted the husband against the wife but also adversely and gravely affected the furtherance of education and parental love and guidance to the children, which constitute the next generation. If we dispassionately see the ground situation and study the realities you see the fissures and the widening gap between people growing. I have personally seen friends and acquaintances and even priests and politicians besides well-meaning businessmen refusing to help hitch-hiking women because they men are afraid that she could be on the road to cheat and exploit.
We believe in equality and we must accept rationally there are equally bad women who must be dealt with equally firmly by law as bad men.
My friends from the legal fraternity, and more specifically Advocate Euclid Heredia brought to my notice that the age-old archaic Victorian law of the British raj is not gender neutral and at all times punishes the male for rape, infidelity, cheating and other crimes against or on women.
But strangely in the era of equality before the law there is no law that punishes a woman for infidelity, cheating, harassment or even sexual molestation. This matter today is before the Supreme Court awaiting its decision that guilty women too must face equal punishment says the lawyers. It is no secret that women cheating on their hard-working husbands stationed abroad is extremely common in Goa.
In the era of working women, finding financial security and empowerment women are equally liberated and ultra-modern that they dominate over their husbands at home and harass, exploit their juniors or even senior colleagues in both obtaining sexual favors or domination but also filing sexual harassment cases, if they fail to meet the career scale up objectives and ambitions.
We agree that Casanovas amongst men must be punished. Sadly, we fail to find a solution to deal with women, who exploit and terrorize men. When a man asks a woman for her share in the bringing up the family it is termed as dowry harassment but a woman is free to engage agents or make open enquiries of what the prospective husband would have to deliver in terms of worldly comforts. If you are to marry me, says the prospective bride, show me your bank balance, the security of your job, the comfort of a house without the meddling of the mother-in-law, details of all properties, stocks and shares that would enable me to accept you as a life partner. Is this equality before the law?
No doubt today gay marriages are on the increase not only due to sexual orientation but due to inequality before law.
There are many incidences, instances with the purview of environmental, psychological and social sciences beyond the scope of this essay to justify as to why the growing gap between the sexes would remain as a challenge, as mankind has over-populated the earth and by unscientifically conducting himself, in a selfish manner has undermined the goodness as well as the tolerance limits of nature as the goodness of sustainable, holistic and sacrifice involving. We must live and let live life in all forms.
