Marilyn Luis Dias
Have you ever done something without realising that you are doing it? Like say, you settle in front of the television to watch a programme and without thinking, before sitting down, you grab something to munch on during your viewing time.
Well, that is a habit at work, which after several repetitions becomes part of your subconscious.
The prefrontal cortex is the part of your brain that is engaged in the present.
However, when one is distressed or stressed out, this part of the brain switches off and one’s instinctual memory-dependent habits kick in.
This is probably why we yell at our spouse or kids when stressed out, even though we know it is bad behaviour. We just can’t help ourselves. The prefrontal cortex has switched off.
However, if you were to practise mindfulness, that is being aware in the moment of how you are feeling when these urges or bad habits start to rear their ugly heads, then you would observe how you are feeling, why you are feeling what you are feeling and the sensations your body is going through.
Take the time out to just be with yourself in that moment, in a gentle and non-judgemental manner, approaching your inner sensations with a sense of curiosity. This gives you a chance to register new information about bad habits you just gave into earlier, like maybe how it didn’t really leave you feeling very good afterwards and soon you’ll find yourself getting disenchanted with them.
For instance, Why am I spending money on this dress? Do I not have enough dresses already? Am I stressed? Is buying this dress comforting me? As I buy this dress do I feel good and content? Is the good feeling this buy has created going to last? For how long? Maybe I don’t need another dress? Maybe I can wait a day or two and see if I’m okay and feel satisfied without buying that dress.
For many, online shopping has become like a soothing liniment to a badly-distressed mind. So when stressors like a bad day at work or an argument with a spouse or even being forgotten by your peer group are encountered, the first impulse would be to reach for something that soothes the mind, like food or the sensations ‘impulse-buys’ give us.
However, if we were to not immediately reach for the thing that gives us relief, be it excessive eating or compulsive buying, but just remain in the present state of distress, being fully aware and mindful of our situation, going through the discomfort prompted by stress, we could then through practice, over the course of time, distance ourselves from the sensations of the mind and body and make decisions that are more rational and beneficial to us.
Money has an unreal feel to it when we use our credit, debit cards or netbanking facilities. We don’t feel the pinch. We only feel the good sensations that buying a nice thing does to our bodies, irrespective of whether we can actually afford it or not. Being mindful helps us to take a step back and stay a moment before making a compulsive and probably bad decision.
