I remember very clearly when I first heard of FC Goa. I had just finished the season and knew my teammate at Real Zaragoza had got an offer too. I had never been away from Europe but saw this as an exciting opportunity.
Five years later, I can tell you that it was the best decision I have ever made. I have never stayed at a club for five seasons and never felt so loved. Goa will always have a special place in my heart. To the fans, I want to say one thing. We miss you. A lot. It’s not really football without you guys on the stands.
This season was a tough one. And first things first, I want you to know we gave it our all. Many things went the way we wanted to. We’re aware that we were not up to the mark this season. However, we are FC Goa. The Club has a long term vision and a plan. We have bounced back before and I am sure that the Club will be back amongst the top again.
On a personal note, I crossed 100 appearances. However, without the fans, the feeling on that day remained an incomplete one. The last five years with the Club has provided me with a journey that I have cherished. I have had moments that I will remember for the rest of my life. And the fans have played a huge part in it. You guys are the lifeline of this club.
Life in a bubbleLife in a bubble is tough. I can’t put it any other way. It’s a torment at times. There is very little to get away from football. And that’s what you need sometimes. Large doses of anything is harmful. Being in what was sort of a glorified cage gave all of us very little in terms of cutting off from things.
Last season was tough as well. However, fortunately our results were good and we found ourselves in the playoffs yet again. Everything gets multiplied in a bubble. The glories and pain. When things are going your way on the pitch, it’s easier to live off of it - even if you’re cut off from the rest of the world. It’s not easy, it’s just a tad easier - as we found out this time around.
We started off on a poor note, but just when we were set to bounce back, our then-head coach moved on. Coach Derrick’s arrival looked like an opportunity for us to reset and we worked hard to spark a comeback. That’s when COVID-19 decided to show up, the biggest villain ever. We lost many days where we couldn’t train, had to play despite not being fully fit and ready, a lot of players had to rest up and isolate themselves because of the virus - it affected us badly. During this whole phase we were all confined to our individual rooms with no one to speak to or spend time with. It was like we were in prison.
With very little bonding time, we just couldn’t work well together during matches and the results only made it worse. This was not something that we alone faced - other teams and even officials were going through the same situation and it was there for all to see. Nobody could maintain a clear headspace and it led to plenty of individual mistakes - from our part, from the part of the officials and so on. In short, we had very few good days all season. The biggest loss - the absence of the fans, of course.
Football is for everyone, but it’s more for the fans than for everyone else. We, the players, play the sport for you. You, in turn, cheer us from the stands, support us wherever we go and shower us with love and that’s where we derive our inspiration from - to give it our all, to try and make you smile as the referee blows his final whistle. And I speak for all my teammates when I say that we missed you dearly in the past two years.
All of these, however, are not excuses. We have no excuses for our results. I only hope that we can do better and make amends in the next season - in front of you all as you return to watch us play. I just can’t wait.
(Edu Bedia is the captain of ISL team FC Goa)
